I solved my problems with sound by installing the xmms-arts plugin for xmms: this allows xmms to use the KDE sound subsystem instead of talking to the sound device itself. Of course, I lost one of my favorite stations today, so this is less valuable than it was.
And I can suspend and resume the laptop by simply shutting down the network interface and closing the lid. Open the lid, type ‘ifconfig an0 up’ and we’re off to the races. Instantly.