Flatland, by Edwin A. Abbott

Flatland: Section 1 Of the Nature of Flatland

I call our world Flatland, not because we call it so,
but to make its nature clearer to you, my happy readers,
who are privileged to live in Space.

Imagine a vast sheet of paper on which straight Lines,
Triangles, Squares, Pentagons, Hexagons, and other figures,
instead of remaining fixed in their places, move freely about,
on or in the surface, but without the power of rising above
or sinking below it, very much like shadows–only hard
with luminous edges–and you will then have a pretty correct
notion of my country and countrymen. Alas, a few years ago,
I should have said “my universe:” but now my mind has been
opened to higher views of things.

In such a country, you will perceive at once that it is
impossible that there should be anything of what you call
a “solid” kind; but I dare say you will suppose that
we could at least distinguish by sight the Triangles, Squares,
and other figures, moving about as I have described them.
On the contrary, we could see nothing of the kind,
not at least so as to distinguish one figure from another.
Nothing was visible, nor could be visible, to us,
except Straight Lines; and the necessity of this
I will speedily demonstrate.

Place a penny on the middle of one of your tables in Space; and
leaning over it, look down upon it. It will appear a circle.

But now, drawing back to the edge of the table, gradually lower
your eye (thus bringing yourself more and more into the condition
of the inhabitants of Flatland), and you will find the penny
becoming more and more oval to your view, and at last when you
have placed your eye exactly on the edge of the table
(so that you are, as it were, actually a Flatlander)
the penny will then have ceased to appear oval at all,
and will have become, so far as you can see, a straight line.

The same thing would happen if you were to treat
in the same way a Triangle, or a Square, or any other figure
cut out from pasteboard. As soon as you look at it with your eye
on the edge of the table, you will find that it ceases to appear
to you as a figure, and that it becomes in appearance a straight line.
Take for example an equilateral Triangle–who represents with us
a Tradesman of the respectable class. Figure 1 represents
the Tradesman as you would see him while you were bending over
him from above; figures 2 and 3 represent the Tradesman,
as you would see him if your eye were close to the level,
or all but on the level of the table; and if your eye were
quite on the level of the table (and that is how we see him
in Flatland) you would see nothing but a straight line.

When I was in Spaceland I heard that your sailors
have very similar experiences while they traverse
your seas and discern some distant island or coast
lying on the horizon. The far-off land may have bays,
forelands, angles in and out to any number and extent;
yet at a distance you see none of these (unless indeed
your sun shines bright upon them revealing the projections
and retirements by means of light and shade), nothing but
a grey unbroken line upon the water.

Well, that is just what we see when one of our triangular
or other acquaintances comes towards us in Flatland.
As there is neither sun with us, nor any light of such
a kind as to make shadows, we have none of the helps
to the sight that you have in Spaceland.
If our friend comes closer to us we see
his line becomes larger; if he leaves us
it becomes smaller; but still he looks like
a straight line; be he a Triangle, Square,
Pentagon, Hexagon, Circle, what you will–
a straight Line he looks and nothing else.

You may perhaps ask how under these disadvantagous circumstances
we are able to distinguish our friends from one another:
but the answer to this very natural question will be more fitly
and easily given when I come to describe the inhabitants of Flatland.
For the present let me defer this subject, and say a word or two
about the climate and houses in our country.

MacGuffin

MacGuffin – Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia:

A MacGuffin is a plot device that holds no meaning or purpose of its own except to motivate the characters and advance the story. The device is usually used in films, especially thrillers. The term “MacGuffin” was invented by Alfred Hitchcock, who made extensive use of the device in his films. It is still almost always used in specific reference to Hitchcock’s plots, rather than as a general term for similar narrative conveniences in unrelated stories.

In the story I am writing, the genesis of it was a character who has now become a MacGuffin. But as I noted earlier, I’m just transcribing events as they happen. If I thought he was a main character, obviously I was wrong.

fun with spammers

Thoughts on Spam:

Some poor schmuck looking for an open formmail.pl relay on my server. I honestly felt pity for the guy; 403 and 404 errors all day long can really take the wind out of your sails. So I decided to give the troller something useful to read (repetition is the key to learning).

This brief Perl script has brought me joy; my desire is that it brings formmail.pl trollers joy also. The script, when completely finished, returns an HTML page approximately 10,000,000 bytes long (10MB) and it takes about 2 minutes to do that (the select statement slows things down, so all the joy does not come at once).

I was surprised to see I am getting these as well: anyone who’s still looking for (or hosting) formmail.pl (which wasn’t Y2K-safe) deserves whatever they get.

the peripheral is the computer

The New York Times > Business > Your Money > Digital Domain: After 20 Years, Finally Capitalizing on Cool:

Consider some competitors. Microsoft has a near-monopoly on the basic software used on the hardware owned by most people, enabling the company to extract what is basically a head tax. Google has a near-monopoly in the digital library business, which enables it to do very well with advertising that monetizes eyeballs. But Apple has an absolute monopoly on the asset that is the most difficult for competitors to copy: cool.

Paul Saffo, research director of the Institute for the Future in Menlo Park, Calif., says emphatically, “Hipness is the only asset that matters.” Mr. Jobs had not been able to leverage it in traditional computers because technology in crucial areas had not matured enough to make cool affordably practical on a mass scale. To the extent that cool is based on exclusion of the uncool, Apple was too hip for its own long-term health.

With the introduction of the iPod in 2001, however, Mr. Jobs offered a product that combined cool with inexpensive, truly personal computing that fits in a pocket. Thanks to technological progress, Mr. Jobs now has at his disposal ridiculously cheap processing and memory, which render meaningless the distinction between computer and peripheral. To paraphrase Sun Microsystems, the peripheral is the computer.

Moore’s law helps Apple’s industrial design and user-focused software deliver on its initial promise.

The iPod does a very few things but does them well. The Mini is an extension of that: it’s not a complete computer, but a slot-in replacement for something else.

Now playing: Badge by Cream from the album “20th Century Masters – The Millennium Collection: The Best of Cream”

apache2 — again

a crank’s progress:

now with Apache2

I tried this before — I didn’t realize how long ago — and in my quest for performance (newer versions are rarely the way to go, though), I decided to try this again.

A lot of fumbling around with all the php innards that need to be (re)installed. Seems to work OK now . . .

Now playing: If I Wasn’t Shy by They Might Be Giants from the album “Apollo 18”

are we ever going to learn this?

A natural, low-tech solution to tsunamis: mangroves | csmonitor.com:

MADRAS, INDIA – As nations around the Indian Ocean discuss plans for a tsunami early-warning system, environmental scientists here point to an existent, natural form of disaster minimization: mangrove forests.

The coastal trees and shrubs saved the lives of hundreds of people last month, and could save thousands more in the future if further cultivated.

Turns out that their presence on the shoreline of many places — the Caribbean and Gulf of Mexico have them as well — is not just for their benefit. But they have been stripped away in a lot of places for firewood: sounds like a development project waiting to be funded. If it takes just 5 years to establish a grove, we could see a very reasonable form of insurance for people who could use it.

[found in Rebecca’s Pocket]

Now playing: All The Young Dudes by World Party

everything is connected to everything else

The Seattle Times: Pacific Northwest Magazine: Nurturing Our Roots:

“Most young men coming out of our community don’t know who they are,” said Huber when we set off after breakfast for a tour of his 76-acre Delta Farm.

“They’re stuck inside watching TV. These young men are the main reason I do this farming. Farming, you see, gives young people an identity.”

“In 1959,” said Huber, “the general budget for this county was somewhere in the neighborhood of $500,000. The population was about 33,000; 15 percent of that budget was spent on criminal justice. Last year, the budget was $24 million, and the percentage spent on criminal justice was closer to 65 percent. But the population has only doubled!”

These baffling numbers gradually took on meaning as Huber continued. “We’ve changed our economy,” he explained. “We were once a stable, resource-extracting economy. Now we’re something else.” Fishing and logging interests are gone. With more people and fewer farms, there’s a shortage of jobs, so idle kids are getting into trouble.

So Mr Huber is growing more than carrots (and damn fine they are, too: I bought some last week at PCC): he’s growing farmers as part of the ecosystem as the article notes. I like to read things like this so I can be reminded that conscious living begins at home: one of our dinners last week — at which those carrots were featured — was all organic vegetables — collard greens in a lemon sesame sauce, carrots in orange juice with orange segments, and mashed potatoes, complete with some nice flaky biscuits — and it just felt right. I need to do better at finding these gems: that was just luck, but you can make your own luck.

Now playing: – Langsam. Misterioso by Simon Rattle – Birmingham Symphony Orchestra from the album “Symphony No.2 “Resurrection”” | Get it

obligatory opinions on new Apple hardware

<sigh> I need a job so I can grab a Mac Mini and put it to use here. The iPod Shuffle is a neat idea and I can see them flying out the stores . . . woulda been a great stocking stuffer if it been out a month ago.

What I like about both of these is that addressing the old “Apple hardware is too expensive” canard, with it’s corollary “I don’t need all those features”, Apple has managed to design in just the features everyone would find useful — an iPod that holds enough music for your commute/run/workout and a small quiet system that can serve as a wireless base station and internet gateway, without unneeded or duplicated peripherals — at great price points.

I look forward to seeing AAPL trading at that US$100 target real soon.

Don’t shop at Waterstone’s Books

The Woolamaloo Gazette:

Over the course of the Woolamaloo Gazette I have posted on a wide variety of subjects; sometimes on books, movies or simply the city of Edinburgh; often on topical and troublesome ones. This however is one of the most difficult I have ever had to write. Shortly before Christmas, in the spirit of that season, my manager at Waterstone’s asked me to come into the office. Within a few, short moments I was told that for comments I had posted on this web site I was now subject to an enquiry to determine if I should face a disciplinary hearing for ‘gross misconduct’ because I had ‘brought the company into disrepute’. I was informed (more than once) that this could cause my dismissal. I was suspended on pay and escorted from the premises of the bookstore I had worked in for eleven years.

Yet another Fired for Blogging incident?